Shitty Blogs

October 14, 2005

Sorry, Amanda Doerty is not a stupid white girl, because she has a dick

Recently, we found out that Amanda Doerty of Hot Abercrombie chick (HAC), whom we recently reviewed, is not who she says she is. Turns out, HAC is the alter ego of Daniel Zeigenbein from St. Louis, Missouri. Yes, fellow Shitty readers, she’s a he.

Thanks to Cameron and Justin who found this evidence:

I have procured the IP source addresses from the proprieters of certain A-List weblogs for comments made by the HAC… Every single IP resolves to St. Louis, Missouri. Who is in St. Louis, Missouri? Daniel Zeigenbein. In fact, the one IP address that doesn’t simply resolve to St. Louis terminates at Washington University, where Dan transferred to after Vassar.

The girl in the picture on HAC’s site actually belongs to this chick. Horny straight boys can view her other pictures here.

A visit to Daniel’s site reveals a collection of death rock music and bad poetry. Here’s a sample of his poetic dysentery:

You were a dead weight in my womb, living
carcass sprouting from a cunning man’s seed
that rooted in the heart of a black-treed forest
where swollen purple vines strangle one another,
reaching for dim lights. If only I had cut
you out with the surgeon’s knife, a tumor
with hair and teeth and big hollow eye-holes…

I felt some small joy when you were circumsized,
the soft skin sliced off like deli meat. I willed
the scalpel to slip, to create a red pool beneath you,
but my effort was in vain.

Daniel’s gender bending and clear fear of bloody vaginas is sure to be used in some English major’s thesis on postmodernism, technology, and identity. But we’d rather he be the subject of our twisted ways, on all fours taking it like the bitch that he wants to be.

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